Reminders from Nirupama Rajeev

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It was recently that I watched the Malayalam movie titled How Old Are You. There are so many aspects about the life of the protagonist, Nirupama Rajeev, that struck a chord.

All you women who find your life mundane and boring; all those of you who catch yourself saying, "Whatever a woman aspires,  it is after all the pots, the pans, the breakfast, lunch and dinner that matters." - this one's for you!

If you think that's a blow of reality and you were just seeing dreams as a child - change your thoughts. If you want to see yourself grow in this patriarchal society, realize your dreams, want your children (be it boys or girls) to have a different take on life and most importantly, if you want to be yourself - you are just a thought away...

There are friends who have called me complaining that now that their children have begun doing things themselves, they feel lost; they feel they don't have anything much to do and that they are too old to look out for a job. I always ask them a question, "What is it that you have always wanted to do?" Most of the time they simply don't know. You don't know because you have stopped weaving dreams.

A friend once told me that she had always wanted to be a doctor. Now, at the age of 36, that was not a dream that she could chase. Well, first of all, that was not an impossible dream. But yes, it could be highly impractical. But that does not mean the dream's lost and gone forever. That is, my dear ladies, where you have to tweak your thoughts. For example in this case, there are so many alternatives to join the health industry.

That goes for any industry you may be looking into. Check out your options. Find out what interests you. I promise you, there will be some treasure waiting for you. Remember, this universe reveals its goodies only to those who take the trouble to look for it - for those who feel worthy of it. After all, what you ask is what you shall get and what you seek is what you shall find.

It is great when a woman can have a superb support system. Some of you may be even gifted with men in your life who help you do the research and make you achieve great heights. Others may have people around them who may not be all that proactive but wouldn't mind the compromises that they have to make once they are convinced. Both of these are amazing situations. Don't turn down these queen makers with your laziness or lack of interest.

Other than the above two types, there is the next bunch who are a majority. They believe that they risk losing everything if a woman is permitted to do something she believes in. Do they risk the same in their venture? Most likely the answer is a yes. And what may be the actual reason for all the drama and the resistance? The very fact that their life changes, they have to compromise and make their own adjustments. They have to let go. Chasing their own dreams may tend to slow down. The easiest way out of this insecurity - blow up the negatives, criticize, blame the age, showcase children as a trap and use every such tool possible to crush a dream. The she is only meant for the well being of the he and the he's family. I say, don't give too much heed to these tantrums. Like a friend once rightfully pointed out, tantrums are always tantrums. Whether it comes from an adult, a child or a toddler, the best way to deal with it is to ignore it. 

The climax of the movie beautifully portrays one of life's greatest lessons. All those grumpy faces turn happy, appreciative and supportive the moment you turn successful.Success after all will always have a great number of fathers.

The next question would be - what if I am not? The golden answer is - how would you ever know if you haven't tried? And why would you be denied of success? Be positive.

Remember my dear friends! A Kiran Bedi, an Indira Gandhi, a Dr. Tessy Thomas, a Mary Kom or any other woman achiever from any part of this world didn't just drop down from skies with a note in their hands indicating that they are extraordinary and have been sent down for special tasks. They too would have either had a superb support system or would have ignored many grumpy faces or both.

I like a lot many dialogues that How Old Are You had to offer. But the most striking one was, "Your dream is your signature". 

Ladies! Live your dream and leave your signature because you are so totally worth it!

You may also be interested in - How Old Are You : Inspiring